How to Find a Therapist That’s Right for You: 8 Key Tips

If you’re considering therapy — whether to restore a relationship, recover from trauma, adjust to a new life phase, improve your mental health, or just talk with someone — finding the right therapist is the first hurdle to cross.

Researchers have found that the bond between you and your therapist is likely to have a big effect on your growth. That’s why it’s important to do your research, ask questions, and pay attention to your own responses in your search for the therapist right for you.

If you’re new to therapy, the number of mental health professionals can be overwhelming and confusing, but having some goals and tips in mind may help you find the best mental health professional that you need. Follow along for some tips we offer to make this process easier for you.

After figuring out what type of therapy is best for you, the next step is figuring out exactly how your therapist can help you.

Here are some tried-and-true steps to keep your goals in mind while searching for a therapist.

Ask yourself what you want to accomplish and what you need help with. According to a 2018 study, when you and your therapist work together toward the same goals, your outlook will be better.

Having an idea of the areas you’d like to work on can assist your therapist in gaining insight into the areas you believe you need to work on, and this can help kick off therapy, said Ashley Peña, LCSW, executive director at Mission Connection.

“Developing goals can be a team effort between you and your therapist,” she said.

If you think medication may help with your symptoms, you’ll want to find a psychiatrist or practitioner who can prescribe medications.

If you want to be part of a supportive network of people who understand your experiences, you may want to consider looking for a therapist who’s involved with support groups or group therapy sessions.

Your goals may change as you work with a therapist. It’s OK to talk with your therapist about changing the direction of your treatment plan as your needs evolve.

Therapy can be costly, so it’s important to look at your finances and understand your budget. Also be sure to check whether your insurance plan offers help with mental health services.

If you plan to pay for therapy through your insurance plan, your first step might be to look through your plan’s network for a therapist.

It’s also a good idea to find out whether your insurance plan limits the number of sessions you can attend each year and whether using an out-of-network therapist will affect your out-of-pocket costs.

You can still work with a therapist outside of your health insurance, but it may be more expensive. However, if you develop a strong connection with a mental health professional not covered by your network, you can check whether your insurance will reimburse you for appointment costs.

Another option is when therapists offer sliding scales or free services, said Darren D. Moore, PhD, MAED, LMFT.

“Individuals might also consider training programs that may be connected with colleges or universities, like student interns who are working towards their degree, are typically supervised by a licensed professional and/or credentialed faculty member while they are providing services,” he said.

“Some therapy practices in the community also take on interns who can see clients, typically at a reduced cost or in some cases free of charge,” Moore added.

A referral from a friend, colleague, or doctor you trust is another way to find a therapist who might be a good fit for you.

While a referral is a good place to start, it’s important to recognize that you may have different needs and goals with your therapy than the person giving you the recommendation. So, a good match for them might not be as beneficial to you.

Remember that finding a therapist can be an overwhelming and long process due to the current therapist shortage, Peña said, so try not to get discouraged if a personal referral doesn’t pan out.

“Starting somewhere is your first step,” she said. “Although it can be a challenging time identifying a therapist, therapy has never been more accessible due to telehealth services.”

Telehealth services can be a great option if you don’t know anyone in therapy or can’t use a personal referral.

If you’re part of a specific community, some resources may be available.

• students with access to a university counseling center
• a workplace wellness or employee assistance program
• group or one-on-one therapy through a local advocacy organization
• faith-based treatment through a church, synagogue, mosque, or other worship center

Additionally, depending on where you live, there may be local support groups or organizations you can attend at neighborhood meeting spots, like a community center.

“For people who can’t afford traditional therapy, they may be able to take advantage of these groups that may be available in person or virtually, some of which may be completely free or at a reduced cost,” Moore said.

“If you feel overwhelmed and are having difficulty identifying a therapist through local referrals, searching online can provide immediate resources,” Peña said.

Your search could start simply by typing in your ZIP code to generate a list of counselors in your area. You may also be able to search for specialists, like marriage and family counselors or therapists who focus on drug and alcohol use.

Some of the most commonly used online search tools include:

If you’re looking for a therapist to help with a specific mental health condition, you might find local therapists through a national association, network, or helpline.

Here are a few examples of organizations that offer search tools to help you find a specialized therapist near you:

Additionally, many workplace organizations and trade unions have resources to help you identify professionals who can assist with mental health needs.

Coming to therapy without any set expectations can be very beneficial, Peña said.

“Beginning therapy with an open mind and vulnerability can assist with identifying areas you’d like to work on,” she said. “Sometimes, the areas we think we need to work on are only the tip of the iceberg, and the true work may take place looking deeper.”

That said, it’s important to ask your therapist some questions to assess whether they will be a good fit for you.

When you meet your therapist, whether online, on the phone, or in person, have some notes handy to remember anything you’d like to ask.

“Sometimes individuals believe they need to hold back on requesting certain information from mental health service providers,” said Dr. Matthew Boland, a licensed clinical psychologist. “But client/patient rights allow for getting all your questions and concerns met. Platforms should have built-in methods to help you address any concerns you have.”

• Are you a licensed psychologist in this state?
• How many years have you been in practice?
• How much experience do you have working with people who are dealing with [the issue you’d like to resolve]?
• What do you consider to be your specialty or area of expertise?
• What kinds of treatments have you found effective in resolving [the issue you’d like to resolve]?

• If I need medication, can you prescribe it or recommend someone who does?
• Do you provide access to telehealth services?
• How soon can I expect to start feeling better?
• What do we do if our treatment plan isn’t working?

Note: If you’ve ever been abused by someone in authority or affected by trauma or racism, you may want to ask questions that help you find out whether a potential therapist is culturally informed and sensitive to your experiences.

No matter how many professional accreditations your therapist has, your own feelings of trust and comfort should be your top priority. Will therapy be uncomfortable from time to time? Possibly. After all, you’ll likely be discussing difficult, personal topics.

But if you feel uncomfortable with your therapist for any other reason, it’s all right to look for someone else. You don’t need a reason to switch therapists. It’s enough that you don’t feel comfortable.

According to a 2022 Healthline survey on online therapy, 52% of respondents found a therapist that made them feel safe and comfortable on the first try. However, 48% of respondents met with two or more therapists before finding one that fit their needs and made them feel comfortable and safe.

Keep in mind the aforementioned potential red flags to determine whether your discomfort is just general nerves from starting therapy or if you’re truly feeling uncomfortable with your new therapist.

If you feel like you can’t talk with them honestly, or like they’re not fully listening, that might be reason enough to discontinue therapy with them.

Here are a few things to notice as you talk with your therapist:

• Does the therapist interrupt you, or do they listen carefully to what you’re saying?
• Does the therapist respect your time by being prompt to appointments?
• Does the therapist brush off or invalidate your concerns?
• Do you feel seen, heard, and respected during your session?